The surrogacy journey is truly extraordinary and life-changing, leading up to a beautiful culmination. But here’s something many people might not know: the end of a surrogacy journey is much more than just a moment in the delivery room. It’s a profound transition for both the surrogate and intended parents, involving physical and emotional adjustments as they close this incredible chapter and embark on a new path. It’s important to understand what to expect during this transition so that it can be a smooth and fulfilling closure. In this article, we’ll delve into the various aspects of transitioning out of surrogacy and provide valuable insights to help you navigate this unique phase with joy and confidence.
The transition out of surrogacy
The process of handing off the baby from the gestational surrogate to the intended parents is not the only transition that takes place during the end of surrogacy. Both the surrogate and intended parents will experience a significant physical and emotional transition as the birth of the baby initiates the closing of the surrogacy chapter and the start of an entirely new journey.
For the surrogate, giving the baby she gestated for nine months to the intended parents represents a significant milestone; she has successfully given her intended parents the ultimate life-long gift.
For the intended parents, they will shift into a completely new lifestyle, one that they could once only dream about.
As a result, both parties have a wave of emotions during this transitory period. It is completely natural for both the surrogate and the intended parents to have a lot of feelings during this stage of the process.
No matter what kind of emotions you feel, know that they are valid.
For surrogates, the majority will feel immense accomplishment and joy. However, some may feel a sense of loss, especially those who have developed a strong relationship with their intended parents. Grief is also a normal feeling to have and can be mended by maintaining a relationship with the intended parents after the journey has ended.
Similar to surrogates, many intended parents also can feel a variety of emotions, all of which are completely normal and valid. Some new parents feel extreme joy and excitement, while others feel overwhelmed and anxious. These feelings of nervousness make sense, however – it’s daunting to even think about such a small, helpless child being fully reliant on you. Luckily, intended parents can bond with their new baby in many ways after surrogacy.
Bonding with your child after surrogacy
While the arrival of a long-awaited baby brings immense joy and excitement, it’s normal for parents to have concerns about forming an emotional connection with a child who was carried by someone else. Some parents may feel an instant connection, while others may take some time to develop a deep emotional bond. However, it’s important to remember that bonding takes time and can be established in various ways.
Skin-to-skin contact is a powerful method that promotes closeness and releases bonding hormones. Talking to the baby and creating a familiar environment at home also play crucial roles in nurturing the parent-child relationship. It’s important to be patient and seek support if needed, as bonding unfolds differently for each parent and child. By engaging in bonding activities such as skin-to-skin contact, talking to the baby, and creating a nurturing environment, intended parents can establish a strong emotional connection with their new baby, laying the foundation for a lifelong bond filled with love and care.
Returning to surrogacy
For gestational surrogates, the feeling of immediately wanting to jump back into surrogacy may arise. Many surrogates will experience this desire after handing the baby off to the intended parents and watching as they cradle the gift they wanted so badly and will be eternally grateful for. With this experience comes an immense amount of joy and fulfillment. Some intended parents wish to pursue surrogacy a second time, so a surrogate may have the opportunity to work with their intended parents more than once.
The transition that takes place after the surrogacy journey ends can be difficult. There are a lot of emotions that both sides may feel. For the intended parents, many feel a sense of joy and fear. For gestational surrogates, many feel a great sense of satisfaction but sometimes loss. It’s important to be aware of the feelings you may encounter as your surrogacy journey comes to an end. Understanding these emotions can help you transition better as you close this chapter of your life and reflect on your experience for the future.
Your relationship and communication with your surrogate or intended parents are going to become different after the surrogacy journey ends. The surrogate will move on after pregnancy, and the intended parents will have a newborn to care for. A good way to make the final transition more pleasant and meaningful is to find a way for the intended parents to keep in touch with the surrogate, even if that just means sharing significant milestones. This can help both parties maintain a positive, lasting relationship.
Embarking on a new chapter
If you’re considering surrogacy or are currently on a surrogacy journey, remember that the end is just the beginning of a new chapter. The emotions you experience during this transition are normal and valid, whether you’re a surrogate or intended parent. Remember to cherish the accomplishments and joys while acknowledging any feelings of loss or change.
At Fairfax Surrogacy, we understand the complexities of the surrogacy journey and are here to support you every step of the way. Contact us today for more information and guidance as you navigate the beautiful and transformative world of surrogacy. Together, we can help make your surrogacy journey a truly remarkable and fulfilling experience.